And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
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