porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
