we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Randomize