"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
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I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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