My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize