I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
