Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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