honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
