He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
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I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
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I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?