we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
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I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
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You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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