Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
A bitchslap is in order.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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