I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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