i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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