The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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