i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
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You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
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I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
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