I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
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So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
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I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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