i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I booty called her while she was in labor.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
