He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
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