i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
