you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize