Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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