Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
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