my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize
