There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize
