I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Randomize