oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize