We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
