I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Randomize