i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
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