I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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