I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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