Don't make out with my wife yet
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
