dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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