I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
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