I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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