Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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