woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
