Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at templeĀ
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize