I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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