Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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