Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
