if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
home. puking in laundry basket.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
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