Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
