Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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