new low.... made out with someone while peeing
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
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