She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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