I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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