Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize