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• (631): View more from New York

  I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.

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• (806): View more from Texas

  Jesus knows you're telling a lie.

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  Tell me the dirtiest joke you know

  (1-907): View more from Alaska

  Sarah Palin

  (907): View more from Alaska

  god, I love you

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (425): View more from Washington

  we turned his baptism video into a drinking game

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!

  (1-859): View more from Kentucky

  please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?

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• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night

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• (831): View more from California

  After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.

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• (561): View more from Florida

  I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.

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• (562): View more from California

  I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs

  (310): View more from California

  the cheaper the better

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