So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.