Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize
