Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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